at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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