All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
Randomize
