This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
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