and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Randomize
