I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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