Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
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