And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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