i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
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