YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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