can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
