He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize
