the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
40s are totally the cure
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize