Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Randomize
