I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
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