I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I swear to god I'm going to hunt down and stab the next telemarketer that calls from a blocked number while I'm waiting for my STD results...
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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