Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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