Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Man, it's really obvious that I was either handcuffed or tied up last night. Either way, not something you'd want coworkers knowing.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize
