Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
