Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I am midnight drunk by noon
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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