why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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