I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
i woke up with a shamrock tattoo on my wrist and a fat bruise on my hipbone. please tell me its not real.
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