their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Pretty sure I asked the person at the pharmacy counter in Walgreens to marry me last night. But also remember Rachel Maddow crawling through the TV screen, so my memory might be a bit compromised...
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
this is an emotional support booty call
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
