I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
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