just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
