I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
My Uber driver last night was driving a taxi and tried to charge me fare.
You didn't get in your Uber because your ex was driving, that was a legitimate taxi.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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