...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
