You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
The air was thick with penises
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
