I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
