dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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