He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
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Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
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She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
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