Don't you send me to vm
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
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