just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize
