he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
i dont even know how to be here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize