she was so not down for the gang bang
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
