he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
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