hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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