I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
