Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
