Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
