so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
Randomize
