i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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