I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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