Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Went to the doctors. She saw my " I love beer" tattoo. All she said was " My drunken tat is of just one word. "Cornnuts.". Then said Mexico was "awesome." And sent me on my way. Yeah. She's my favorite doctor.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
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