He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
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She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
You are a genius and a whore.
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