im about as happy as oj after his trial
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
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