so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize
