i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I will give you all my nachos to make this happen
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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