he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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