So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
