no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
You just sat there staring at your apple and saying "I'm so glad you're here" to it every time you took a bite.
Randomize
