My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
